if love

came knocking on my door
i would not
recognize it
&
it might come in,
under the guise of something else,
a million a thousand a hundred and one times
somehow knowing what I find appealing
in words and deeds-
i receive her words
like that insurance salesperson with her foot
in the door before
you shut it.

was it the look of desperation that they saw?
&
if love
came knocking on my door
i would not
recognize it
&
 it might come in,
under the guise of something else
not well-meaning:

something
i might be convinced i needed.
a dream
reaching with the outstretched hand
for that which probably
did not exist
but anyway,
reaching,
grasping
something with the substance
equal to air
always:
invisible
but heavy
under the weight of something artificial or lacking in value or importance
to make one think that's all there is:
consciousness.
to be honest .
but i'm told it /love
is available to anyone who asks for it.
true?

if so, then where are you?

see me waving my arms?
--alexgeorge